I was gonna be all deep

but then I turned on Miss. Universe and all the deep stuff went out the window.

What has become of the pagent circuit? The girls are the same. Miss. Venezuela is still super tall and a volleyball player and Miss. USA was from Texas, but the hosts were Jerry Springer and Mel B from the Spice Girls. WHAT??

There they are in Vietnam cruising along Halong Bay, my dream destination, wearing sashes and laughing. It was just so wrong, but I didn't change the channel. Couldn't do it. I was totally rubber necking and watching the traffic accident.

And then, Miss. USA fell during the evening gown competition. It was shocking. I literally sat up, put my hand on my chest, and took one of those overly dramatic girly inhales. But she picked herself up, walked the circuit, and kept smiling. It was quite impressive.

This would have totally been a good lesson learning moment for a little girl, but I took something away from it too.

My cave

Years and years ago I had a friend Jenn who trully believed in the book "Men Are From Mars and Women Are From Venus". She dated according to the book. We all thought she was crazy, but she hooked herself an internal medicine resident at 22 and was married 6 months later. Maybe she knew what she was doing.

Anyway, she gave me a discourse once on how since time began, when men were tired or in a bad mood, they need to retreat to their cave. They need a minute by themselves to figure things out, detox, relax, and being women, we usually don't take this well because we want to talk to them and help. So, we are supposed to back off and let them hibernate until they are ready for us again.

Hmm. I don't really think this only applies to men. I cave all the time. Last night, I caved. My bedroom is my cave I'm guessing. I turn the house down to cold, which right now is 75, pull up the duvet and a good book and just curled up. I don't want to deal with anything or anyone.

The book of the moment which I picked up at the airport and finished last night was "Richistan". It talked about the lives of the uber wealthy. I was fascinated to see how people live and spend their money. I say I won't be like that when I make my million, but my ability to conspiculously spend as I've gotten older has really grown.

Tonight when I cave, I'm going to bring in my computer and maybe do some budgeting!!

Playing Hooky

I was a bad bad girl. Well, my version of bad. I worked all day yesterday. Hour after hour of weight management cases. I read all this documentation about people trying to change their lives, but not doing very well. I was kinda tired and done. I needed a break. So, I picked up the rental car from the hotel and just drove myself to the zoo. I deserved it. I was in San Diego. What is more San Diego then the Zoo? Ok, maybe the Navy. I got lost and found the base, but I couldn't get on. So, I kept going until I got to the zoo.

It was me in my suit, sipping a coke from a monkey straw and watching all the sleeping animals. I swear, they all knew I was coming and decided to take a nap. They must know I'm a napper and thought I would be ok with it. Luckily, the hippos were awake.

We had a nice conversation through the foot thick glass

I had just read an ariticle on gorilla deaths the Congo in National Geographic and then I spied all these signs leading to the gorilla habitat, so I went. Ok, first thing I have to point out is that the San Diego zoo is built on a hill, and the gorillas are on the top of the hill. Imagine me walking up hill for ten minutes in heels dodging strollers and snotty kids. I was not a happy camper. By the time I got up to the gorillas, I was annoucing under my breath "this better be good". LUCKILY, they had just thrown some popcorn in the habitat and it was gorilla party time. Everyone came out for popcorn.

I sat there for a while, trying to get my heart rate back to normal, and followed the meandering herd to the zebras.

Overall, it was nice nice nice. I bonded with a mountain lion who looked like a big Penny. And I saw the koalas. I love the koalas. They just ate, and when they were done, they rolled over and slept. I kept expecting them to turn to me and start talking like a stoned crocodile hunter.

I need to detox like that more often.

Where I Could Live

I am leaving for San Diego for a couple of days. I'm really trying not to travel so much, but that doesn't seem to be working great this last month. I fear I may be in San Francisco soon.

Last night instead of counting sheep, I counted places I could live. San Diego and San Francisco are on the list, but I would need a significant pay raise.

The list (in no particular order):
San Diego
San Francisco
Seattle
Portland
New York
Atlanta
Chicago
Nashville
DC
Austin

I know I have listed everwhere that everyone wants to live, but to be honest, I could live anywhere. I survived 3 years in Detroit. I probably could do Billings if I had to or even Las Vegas.

6 years ago I dreaded moving to Dallas, but I sucked it up and did it. Dallas is kinda a scary town too, in its own way.

Tahir and his new spin

Almost five years ago, I made my first real job change. I went from a big power house consulting firm that was sucking away my life source and all my goodness to a small boutique firm that promised happiness, no travel, and a 36 hour work week. I believe of those 36 hours I only really worked 5 a week. I spent the rest o fthe time internet surfing and talking with people in the office.

Being as the office only had 14 people in it, you had a limited choice of who to talk to. I became close with a coworker of mine Tahir. Tahir had his own life philosophy. He called himself a neo-malthuseann. He was a reformed ladies man who was married with two kids. He decided to impart all his former playa wisdom to me. It made the day go quickly.

I have since changed jobs, but Tahir and I have kept in touch. We met the other night for dinner and again he passed off to me some of his worldly knowledge. We discussed the cowboy from the other weekend and how I couldn't get him out of my mind. Tahir said that I am genetically predispotioned to mate with that man or a man of that type. He went off for a good half hour about it. He said its all in my genes

I agreed. I was totally willing to mate with that man, but I'm not sure if it has anything to do with my genes. Next time I see him I will bring it up. Maybe it will be a good pickup line "do you know I am genetically predispositioned to mate with you? Should we do it now?"

Pictures

Someone, I won't name names, but someone was getting at me last night about my picture taking. They explained to me that they don't like to be in pictures. I understand this. I know. So, they questioned why when we went on vacation I kept taking incessant pictures of them. I pointed out that of the 150 pictures I had taken of our vacation, they were in exactly 8, and they needed to get over their issue. I don't like having 150 pictures of bridges and buildings. Personally, when others show me those kind fo pictures I clock out. I need to see at least one or two humans in them.

I've really tried to be better about picture taking. Ok, lately that has kind of gone down the toilet as my camera has permanently sat on my coffee table, but usually I try to be better about it because I realized a couple of years ago that I have no pictures from a good 6 years of my life. It was weird. There is a whole slew of friends whom I don't have a picture of.

Again, someone got at me last night. They said that they don't care about having pictures like that. They don't need pictures because the memory is in their head. Yeah, its in my head too, but I don't remember everything. And then all of a sudden I see a picture of something I'm missed, and it just makes me happy.

I did not point out that this same person who "doesn't like pictures" took about 10 of me at Katie Branch's birthday 4 years ago on a very early morning trail ride with no makeup. I'm just saying. I suck it up for others. Others can suck it up for me.

Invasion of the Body Snatchers

Saturday afternoon while I was relaxing off my food coma at my friend Jennifer's, I rediscovered the beauty that is cable. Ohhhh cable, how I love thee. You show good TV shows and movies all the time. We watched "The Invasion" for a little bit. Not a very good movie. I believe it was a remake of "Invasion of the Body Snatchers" starring Nicole Kidman. We had issues with her the whole movie. She was supposed to be emotionless so that no one would infect her, and she was a huge ball of nerves. I mean she was the worst emotionless person ever!!

Anyway, I was having a conversation at dinner last night about a friend who had gotten married not too long ago, and quite honestly, it was one of those "invasion of the body snatchers" marriages. We never saw or heard from her again. She seemed to take on this whole new life of married. All her new friends were married and they were on co-ed athletic teams together. And you know I've seen them out with their married friends, and they are all blond and cute and excessively happy.

I don't know. I know tons of other people who seem to be able to handle marriage and friends. I don't want to lose myself to someone. Maybe that's my problem. It's not a fear of commitment per se, but rather a fear of becoming a freak from outer space with no personality who is just like everyone else.

Maybe...